The Dramas of Jane Quimby
by bewitchedbookworm84
Summary: What happened after season one of Jane by Design? Jane's realization of her feelings for Billy. She just has to get away and Jeremy might just be the way out.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One: Heart Shattering Realization

Standing here listening to Billy say "it's you" to Zoe on stage is hard enough for me, but when they lock lips in a kiss that was supposed to be ours I can't take it anymore. As if my night can't get any worse I turn to find my boss Gray and her nephew Eli standing right behind me.

"Jane, what are you doing here," Gray asks.

I am at a loss for words, after all that I've been through tonight now this. I am so numb after my revelation of being in love with my best friend and not being able to have him the only thing I can manage to say is, "We'll talk about it on Monday." With that I make my way around the two shocked faces staring at me and leave my school.

I walk out into the parking lot wanting to be rid of the tidal wave of emotion I feel at the moment. _When did this happen, how could I not know I'm in love with my best friend. It doesn't matter now anyway he's with Zoe and I can't bring myself to come between them like I did with him and Lulu. He deserves to have his chance at happiness; I can't be selfish with him anymore. That's what loving someone is all about right? Letting them find their own happiness even if it's not with you and it kills you inside. And to top it off Gray and Eli of all people had to show up here. I know that India did this to me she knows my little secret and wants to take me down. Well, it looks like she going to get everything she wants. _As I reach the Beast I feel the stinging in my eyes start to intensify. Tears run down my face hot and fast. I get into the old beat up car that Billy loves so much and just sit there trying to compose myself enough to drive home. I must have sat there for a while because there was a knock on my window. I look up from my hands and notice my big brother Ben standing there with a concerned look on his face.

"What's the matter Jane," he asks worried threw the window. He knows I never cry unless something really horrible is bothering me.

I roll down the window and sadly reply, "It's nothing Ben I really don't want to talk about it now okay. I just want to go home take a shower and crawl into bed."

"But what about Billy, you didn't even stay long enough to congratulate him on his awesome performance," he asks knowing that Billy and me are like two peas in a pod. I just shake my head and roll up the window. I start the car and make my way back home. _I really hope Billy doesn't come over tonight I just don't think I'll be able to face him now, maybe I'll never be able to again. Oh why couldn't I realize my feelings sooner like when he said those same words to me not so long ago. _I pull up to the curb in front of my house and gloomily make my way into the front door.

I trudge straight into my room not bothering to turn the lights. I want it to be dark and hopeless just like my heart. I enter my room and head to my dresser where I find some of Billy's clothes that he leaves here for when he stays over. I grab a pair of his comfy sweatpants that are too big on me and a t-shirt as well, making my way into the bathroom. I flip on the light and look and my tear-stained reflection in the mirror. _Wow I look horrible._ I turn and start the water for a hot shower I just need to wash away the hurt that I'm feeling. I strip down and step into the steaming stream of water and my muscles relax, I didn't realize how tense I was as I sigh with gratification. The bliss is short-lived as my mind starts to wander again. _What am I going to do now without my best friend? I know that he's going to come here trying to find out why I left so suddenly. What am I going to tell him? I know I'll just tell him that Gray showed up at the school tonight, that's less than half the reason why. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to keep things with Billy and me together. I'm going to have to find a way to get out of here and away from him before I break down and tear him and Zoe part._

With my mind-set on my half-true explanation I step out of the shower. I pull on Billy's clothes and bask in the smell of the boy I love. Tears start to form in my eyes again as I head back into my room. I writhe into my empty bed that Billy frequents nightly, pull the covers over my head and weep until I fall asleep. I don't know how long I'm sleeping when I'm awoken by my bedroom window opening. I don't bother to look to see who it is, I already know. The bed slumps at the added weight of my best friend as he lays down next to me in his usual place. I stir a little and pretend to still be asleep so I won't have to deal with him while my heart is aching.

I feel him wrap his arms around me as he lays his head close to mine, I can feel his breath on my ear as he whispers, "'Nite Janie, I love you." The pain from those words rip at my insides like a hungry beast. _Of all the things for him to say, he just has to say those words. The words I so badly urn to say to him, but can't because I'll ruin what he has with Zoe. I know that when it comes to me and anyone else Billy would always chose me, but I just can't be that selfish._ I lay there in the dark with him and once more cry myself to sleep.

**Authors Note: I don't own any of the rights of characters for Jane by Design. Please review! Also this is my first story so any thoughts are welcome. Thank you.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: Gotta Get Out of Here

My eyes ache as I open them to the sight of the sun barley peaking through my window. _Ugh, what time is it?_ I look at the alarm clock on my nightstand and it reads 5 a.m. I still have Billy's arms around me and all I want to do is get out of this bed before the tears start-up again. I unwrap myself from his hold and gently make my way out of the bed. As quietly as I can I tiptoe to the door and sneak out without waking him. I audibly let out a sigh of relief, as I turn and see my brother standing in the kitchen. _Oh, great now he's going to start asking about last night._ I really don't feel like talking to anyone about my problems it's high time I figure things out for myself for once. He opens his mouth to say something, but I put my hand up to silence him. He looks at me quizzically as I walk over to the coffee maker and pour myself a cup. I turn without looking at him and walk out the door. I sit on the steps of the front porch and contemplate about what I am going to do next. It's Sunday morning and I have nothing to do, but sit around and wait for Billy to wake up and start with the questioning. _I can't face him now I gotta get out of here before he wakes up._ I stand up quickly remembering I'm still in his clothes and shake it off, with my mind set that I am going to go shopping even if I do look like a homeless girl. _I'll just wear something out of the store._ With that I make my way back into the house, grab my shoes, purse and keys to the Beast as quickly as I can. Noticing that Billy is now awake and in our bathroom.

I high-tail it to the car and jump in throwing my shoes into the passenger seat. I turn the key in the ignition and the car roars to life, I punch the gas leaving tire makers in my wake. I drive fifteen minutes to my favorite thrift shop and park. I slip my shoes on and head into my sanctuary. _Thank god they're open this early._ Shopping always makes me feel better even in the worst of circumstances. I receive a few weird looks as I enter the building because of my attire no doubt. I shrug it off and start browsing, I find a few thing that I just need to have. I buy all the items including the outfit that I changed into. It's a flared red and white polka dot skirt with a white button up blouse and red pumps to go with it. I also buy a white sun hat and white rimmed sunglasses. I defiantly fell a little better when I'm done, but not by much. I still have the dark cloud of Billy and Gray looming over my head. It's just about lunch time when I finish shopping so I decide to stop by my favorite café to grab a quick bite.

As I'm sitting there eating my salmon steak trying to figure out what I'm going to do about my situation my phone starts to ring. I look at the screen only to see Jeremy's face on it. _Jeremy, why on earth is his calling me I haven't talked to him in ages?_

I answer my phone, "Jeremy?"

"Helo Jane, how are you," came his pleasant British accent.

I break down and start sobbing. _What the hell is the matter with me? I can't go whining about all my problems to Jeremy. _But do it anyway.

"Oh Jeremy I don't know what to do. I'm so confused about my life now. So many things are going wrong I just don't know where to turn. I have to get out of this town after I deal with Gray who's probably going to fire me tomorrow," I'm weeping heavily like a child into the phone.

"Calm down love, what do you mean Gray is going to fire you? Why on earth would she do that you've done so much for the company," he asks trying to figure out the story.

"I know India told you that I'm underage Jeremy. You know that it's illegal for a minor to have the job title that I do in the United States. India ended up sending Gray to my high school play that I was design for and well now she knows about my misrepresentation, I just know that Gray's going to fire me."

"Well then I have a bit of good news for you Jane. My line has finally taken off and I was hoping that you would come to London and be my partner. I know it's a lot to ask of you, but…"

I cut him off mid sentence, "When do you want me to come to London?"

There is a short pause before he replies, "That was a lot easier than I thought it would be, when do you think you could get here, the sooner the better really?"

I think about it for a moment. _There's only two more days left until summer break I think I can miss them._ "I'll book a flight today when I get home and be on a plane as soon as I'm done meeting with Gray," I answer a little shocked at myself for being so eager to leave the country.

"Fantastic darling, I can't wait to see you just text me the time you'll be arriving in London and I'll come and get you," he sounds beyond excited.

"Thanks Jeremy, I will. I'll see you soon," and with that I end the call. My heart is racing a mile a minute. _Thank you God for giving me a way out of this mess._

I make my way home happy and sad all at the same time. For one I'll be able to get away from my feeling for Billy which makes me happy. But on the other hand I don't want to say goodbye to my best friend even though I know I have to let him go. _I might not even tell him I'm leaving. I'll tell him about the meeting that I have with Gray tomorrow and try to spend my last day here enjoying him. I'll talk to Ben about everything tonight when Billy goes home. _With that I step out of the Beast and enter my house as I try to put on my best smile. I turn to find Ben and Billy lounging on the couch watching TV. They both look up at me as I close the door, Billy with a big smile on his face and Ben looking confused.

"Hey Janie, where'd you go so early this morning," Billy asks.

"I just wanted to get out and do some early morning therapy then I grabbed some lunch," I reply nonchalantly.

His smile fades and is replaced with concern, "Come have a seat and tell me what's going on." He pats the seat next to him and I reluctantly sit beside him with a sigh.

Ben stood and said uncomfortably, "Um…I need to go take a shower." Turning on his heel he makes a quick exit into his bedroom leaving me alone with Billy.

"Alright so what's up, Janie," Billy asks turning on the sofa to look at me.

_I'm in love with you!_ I think to myself before answering him. "I think I might be getting fired tomorrow," I answer.

Billy's eyebrows furrow with confusion, "Wait, what? I don't understand, why would Gray fire you when you've save her ass so many times."

"She was at the school last night and I just so happened to bump into her," I reply with tears starting to pick at my eyes. The only thing I can think about is how much I truly do love Billy and how he always wants to come to my rescue. I could care less about being fired by Gray now that Jeremy has offered me a job.

"Wow, I'm so sorry Janie. I know it's your dream job and all, but don't let it get you down there'll be plenty opportunities out there for someone with your talent. It'll work out for the best I promise. Just think of it this way now we'll be able to spend the whole summer together," he tries to comfort me in the way only he can.

_No we won't because I'm leaving you. _ I think to myself as the tears start to sting my eyes once more. _No I'm not going to cry anymore, not today at least._ He reaches for my face and makes me look at him.

"Come on Janie it's not the end of the world it'll be alright," he tries to reassure me.

I give him a halfhearted smile knowing everything won't be alright. Hugging him tightly I say, "Thanks Billy, you're the best."

"So what would you like to do for the rest of the day? Sky diving, bungee jumping? It's totally up to you. Oh, and by the way you look amazing in that outfit," he says as he holds me close to his chest.

I shrug out of his arms smiling and look into his warm eyes, "You know how much I hate heights Billy. I don't think that kind of thing will ever go on my to do list, how about we go for a ride in the Beast instead. Let's see where the road takes us."

His smile returns as he replies, "Sounds great. Can we pack up some food to take with us though I'm starving."

I go in my room and change into something more suitable for the outdoors, and then I pack up a picnic for the two of us to share. _I can't believe this is the last day I get to spend with him. I have to make it the best day we've ever had together. No more moping until I'm on the plane to London. _With that last thought we head out the door to enjoy the rest of the day.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three: The Last Day with Billy

We drive out-of-town heading towards Syracuse. Billy is behind the wheel driving like he knows where we're going. The ride is mostly spent in comfortable silence until I ask, "Billy where are we going?"

He smiles over at me and answers, "You'll see it's a surprise." He turns on a south bound road and I notice a sign for a town called Truxton. _I've never heard of this place. I wonder what he's up to. _We spend the next twenty-five minutes enjoying the wooded scenery then we reach our destination.

"We're here, Janie," he says with excitement in his voice as he pulls into an empty lot in the middle of nowhere.

"Um…okay. Will you please tell me what we're doing out here," I ask a little nervous about our isolation. _Please don't let it be somewhere romantic. I just have to keep my cool._

He grins and says, "Sorry Janie I just can't ruin the surprise like that. Besides I've been waiting a long time to bring you out here. Now come on let's go. We still have about a five-minute walk ahead of us." He points across the road to a well beaten path heading into the woods.

"What are you up to Nutter," I ask unsure and get out of the car.

"You'll see," he answers as he grabs the picnic basket and takes my hand. He drags me across the street and we head off into the wilderness.

"I'm glad I decided to wear comfortable shoes. I really don't think heals would have been a good choice for this," I ramble as we walk trying to steady my nerves. _Why am I so nervous, it's Billy. Oh yeah that's right because I'm in love with him and he doesn't know it and I'm afraid that I'll spill the beans. Please don't let this be romantic._

"It really wouldn't have mattered I would've carried you if I had to," he laughs looking around at the forest.

We're only walking for a minute or two before I start to hear the roaring sound of flowing water. We come around a bend in the path and I look up to see a beautiful wildflower meadow with a dazzling twenty-foot waterfall cascading down into a medium-sized swimming hole. I notice a path leading under the falls where we could go underneath it. "Billy this is…totally breathe taking," I tell him in awe.

"Yeah, I figured you'd like it. It is pretty awesome isn't it," he smiles and pulls me over to the meadow.

"I take it you want to eat first then explore," I pout wanting to go behind the falls.

"Don't let me keep you Quimby. I'll just grab an apple for now and we can eat together later," he says playfully setting down the basket and digging out an apple. He releases my hand and tells me, "Go ahead I'll catch up with you in a sec. Just please be careful over there okay."

He bites down on the apple holding it in his mouth as he lays the blanket down on the grass. I turn excitedly and rush over to the path leading behind the waterfall. _Damn it, this is so romantic. Leave it to Billy to bring me to a place like this instead of his girlfriend. Okay, keep it together Quimby you can do this._ I carefully make my way behind the curtain of water. It's cool and refreshing after the long drive and short walk that we took. I look up as little drops of water land on my face. _This is so wonderful. I think this is the best surprise he's ever given me. I wonder why he brought me here though._ As I'm trying to figure out his reason I miss step on a slick rock and start to fall. Before I know it there are two strong arms wrapped around me.

"Geez Janie I told you to be careful," Billy says as he holds me close to his warm chest. "Are you okay?"

I look up into his beautiful eyes, our faces only inches apart. "I…I'm fine," I stutter at our closeness as my face becomes warm with embarrassment. He leans down closer to my face and rests his forehead on mine. My breath catches a little. _Oh God please don't kiss me, please do kiss me_. I think to myself ever though every fiber of my body I really wants him to.

"Are you sure you're alright, your face is pretty red. Are you hot? Maybe you need something to eat," he says as he releases me and takes my hand making sure I don't fall again.

My body thoroughly disappointed I follow him back over to the meadow to have our picnic. We take a seat in the warm sun on our comfortable blanket and I begin to take out our food. "So how did you find this place," I ask genuinely curious since he usually tells me everything. _Not about this though. Maybe he was saving it for a special time or something. _

"My brother and me use to come here when we were kids," he answers shrugging his shoulders.

"You never told me about that," I say wondering why.

"Really not much to tell," is all he manages to say before taking a big spoon full of pasta salad in his mouth.

_He's being awfully weird today. What's up with him? _"Is everything okay with you? You're not being your usual self today," I ask letting my curiosity get the better of me.

"I'm good Janie," he replies.

"Oh come on Billy I know that's not true. We've been best friends since the third grade. I think I know when something's bothering you," I tell him with a stern look on my face.

"I know. It's just that I'm still not sure about the whole Nick and Zoe thing. I can't seem to get the image of them kissing out of my head. The worse part is they both seemed to enjoy it," he answers with a scowl on his face.

_I know that feeling. _I think to myself before speaking, "They were just acting you know that." "Besides Zoe seems to be crazy about you. You really shouldn't worry about it," I add as I pack up the left over food. I lie back on the blanket and look up at the clouds floating by slowly.

Billy stretches out next to me and props himself up on his elbow so he can look at me. "You really think so," he asks showing his insecurities.

I roll my eyes at him, "Yes Billy! She'd have to be crazy not to."

He smiles his big megawatt smile at me, "Aw thanks Janie." He leans down and kisses my forehead. He lays back and enjoys the warm sun with me. About ten minutes pass before he sits up quickly, "We should go swimming."

"What, now? We didn't bring our swimsuits," I say a little taken back by his suggestion.

"So we can just go in our underwear, we've done it before," he laughs back at me as he stands and strips down to his boxer-briefs.

I turn away blushing, "We were five when we did that." I don't hear a reply from him so I peek over my shoulder, I see him already in the water smiling back at me.

"Come on Janie don't be a chicken the water feels awesome," he says as he dives under.

_Chicken! I'm no chicken. It's on. _I strip down to my red cotton bra and underwear and walk over to the edge of the pool created by the waterfall. I dip my toes in and find Billy's right the water feels exquisite. I look up and notice he's staring at me, drinking in my body with his eyes. I look down at the water again before he realizes I notice the look on his face. _This is such a bad idea._ I wade into the refreshing water until it's under my chest. Billy has disappeared under the water again. I look around trying to find him, but it's no use. Just when I give up I feel his hands wrap around my ankles and he pulls me under. I reemerge sputtering and gasping for air.

"My bad are you alright. I thought you knew what I was gonna do," I hear him say right in my ear. I notice how close he is to me I can feel his naked chest brushing against my back.

I turn to face him, but he doesn't move away from me. He's looking down at me as the water runs down his handsome face. "I'm…," my words fail me when I see a look in his eyes I don't recognize. _Why is he looking at me like that? _ I wonder. Then my answer comes.

He brings his hand up to my face moving his body closer to mine. He leans down looking into my eyes. _Oh crap!_ He puts his soft warm lips on mine and I find myself kissing him back. He pulls his face away, but only by a few inches. I notice that our breathing has picked up. Before I could do anything his lips find mine once more. After a few seconds I feel my body ignite in response to his hands caressing my hips. He intensifies the kiss by parting his lips and I do the same. I feel his hot tongue gently brush my bottom lip as if he's asking for permission.

When I don't pull away he brings it back into my mouth and caresses my tongue with his. Our tongues slow dance around each other in perfect rhythm. He deepens the kiss and I welcome it wrapping my arms around his neck as he pulls me closer running his hands up and down my waist and thighs. My body is on fire from his touch. His hands eventually find my bottom and he squeezes it gently. He lifts me up and I wrap my legs around his waist. He sucks on my lower lip and lightly nibbles it as I thrust my hands into his wet hair completely lost in the moment. I hear him moan softly as I grind my body against his. Then images of Zoe come flowing into my mind.

I pull away and gasp at the guilt crashing down on my shoulders. "What the hell are we doing Billy? We can't do this, you're with Zoe and you're my best friend," I almost yell at him as I unwrap myself from around him and rush to the bank. I practically run to the blanket where our clothes lay when I notice that he can see through my soaked underwear. I snatch up my clothes and head for the woods completely ashamed of my nakedness.

**Authors Note: Wow I'm kinda sad that no one what's to give me any input on my story. Oh, well the story must go on at least for my mind sake. Thanks to all those are taking the time out to read it though. What do you think is going to happen in the next chapter?**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four: Talking to Ben

We don't speak at all on the way home. It is the most uncomfortable silence I have ever had to endure. So many thoughts run through my mind. _I can't believe I let that happen. I shouldn't have let it go that far. I shouldn't have gone swimming. Our friendship will probably never be the same._ I feel guilty and alone even though Billy's sitting right next to me. I sneak a glance at him through my eyelashes. He looks like he's brooding and angry, but I don't know if he's mad at me or himself.

We pull up in front of my house and I slide out of the car. "Later Jane," he says without taking his eyes off the road in front of him. "Goodbye Billy," is the only thing I manage to say before he drives off. I stand there in shock for a moment as I watch him vanish around the corner. I sadly turn and make my way into the house.

I enter the front door and shift around to see Ben sitting on the couch waiting for me. "Jane we need to talk," he says as I try to head to my bedroom.

_Great now I have to deal with this. I guess it's now or never to bring up London, _"What is it Ben," I ask.

"Look I know something's up with you. You said you didn't want to talk about it last night so I gave you your space, but now you coming in with that gloomy look on your face I can't stay silent anymore," he says looking extremely worried. "Please tell me what's going on."

I sigh and plop down on the couch next to him. "I did something horrible today. I thought last night was bad, but this is so much worse," I tell him with tears in my eyes.

"Um…okay you lost me. How about you start from the beginning," he suggests.

I sit there and tell him everything that has happened. When I get to the events from today he looks like his eyes are about to pop out of his head from shock. I bury my face in my hands after I finish not wanting to look at him. "Things have just gotten way out of control," I whisper.

I feel his hand pat me on the shoulder as he says, "I'm sure everything will work out Jane. It always does between you two. It'll probably be awkward at first, but I bet you'll look back on this one day and have a good laugh."

"No Ben not this time, I don't think we'll ever come back from this. That's why I need to talk to you about something that's really important to me. You probably won't like it, but it's something I have to do," I say as I look up at him.

"Okay shoot," he replies.

I tell him about my job offer from Jeremy and how I want to leave tomorrow after meeting with Gray. He definitely doesn't look pleased by the idea. "What about school," he asks.

"There's only two days left and you know everyone goes just to goof off. I don't think it'll hurt to miss them. Besides I need to get away from here for my sanity. Plus if you let me go to London I'll look into their schooling system as soon as I get there and let you know all about it," I answer.

"What about Billy," is his only reply.

"What about him? He seemed to make it perfectly clear that he has nothing to say to me. And I also need to give him a chance to work things out with Zoe. I don't want to come between then like I didn't with him and Lulu. Please Ben I really need this. I know I can't face him anymore," I'm practically begging.

He lets out a sigh of defeat as he rubs the back of his head, "Fine Jane, but just know that I'm not thrilled about this. Are you even going to tell him you're leaving?"

"Well I was hoping that you…," he stops me mid sentence.

"Oh no, I'm not getting in the middle of this," he says throwing up his hands.

"Please Ben I can't do it," I sob.

"Ugh fine," he answers. "I'm going to bed. Do you need me to take you to the airport tomorrow?"

"Yes please, I think I'm going to let Billy keep the Beast since he loves her so much. I was also wondering if you could take me to my meeting in the afternoon," I ask hoping I'm not pushing my luck.

"Sure, sure. Goodnight," he replies making his was to his room.

"Thanks Ben, goodnight," I say.

I head into my room and fire up my computer. I browse for a one-way ticket to London. I find one that leaves at five p.m. and book it. I pack up some of the things I'll need and go to bed. That night I dream of Billy.

**Authors note: Hi people! I just want to thanks to anyone who is reading my story. Also to all you Jeremy fans don't worry there will be plenty of him in the up coming chapters. Please, please review. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: London Here I Come**

I wake up at six a.m. still exhausted since I didn't sleep well. My dreams are haunted by the passion that Billy and I shared. I wipe the sleep from my eyes and roll out of bed. I head out into the kitchen where Ben is eating breakfast and reading the newspaper.

"Morning," he greets me looking up from his paper.

"Morning," I reply and make myself a cup of coffee.

"I was thinking that since you're leaving today we could both take off from school and spend it together. Maybe I can help you pack and we can grab something to eat before your meeting," he says between bites of his food.

I look at him with wide eyes not believing what he said and reply, "Sure that would be great let me take a shower really fast and then we can get started."

I wonder back into my room with my coffee and find some clean clothes to wear. I go into the bathroom and hop in the shower. As soon as the water hits my bare skin my mind flashes back to yesterday with Billy. I wash myself in a daze. _Did I already wash my hair?_ I think to myself as I scrub in my shampoo. I make myself presentable and head into the kitchen. "I'll be ready to start in a few I just need to text Jeremy," I tell Ben as I go into my room and find my phone.

To: Jeremy

Hey Jeremy I just wanted to let you know that I'll be arriving in London at 11 p.m.

Also, where will I be staying and will I need to buy furniture when I get there?

To: Jane

Brilliant I can't wait to see you.

No need to worry about anything just bring the things you want I managed to get you a fully furnished apartment right across from mine so you're set.

One more thing you don't need to worry about rent either I'll take care of that until you get on your feet. See you soon.

I shut my phone and put it in my back pocket. I walk out into the living room and let Ben know that I'm ready to start packing. As I go threw all my clothes and pack my suitcases Ben is packing odds and ends into boxes to have shipped. I start going through my dresser and open Billy's drawer, tears well up in my eyes as I think about how much I'm going to miss him. I decide to take a pair of his sweatpants and a t-shirt with me.

My brother notices me crying and says, "Are you gonna to be okay? You know you can always change your mind and stay."

"No I'll be fine once I'm in London and bury myself in work," I reply wiping the tears from my face.

We finish packing around one o'clock and I have three suitcases and one carry-on to take with me. The rest of my stuff is boxed up and ready to go.

"Well that's the last of it let me just change for my meeting and then we can go get some lunch," I say as I shoo him out of my room. I put on a purple blouse with a red skirt and wrap a black belt around my waist. I grab my purple pumps and walk out into the living room. I notice Ben has already loaded my luggage into his car.

"You ready, kid," he asks.

"I think so," I reply as I take one last look at my now bare room. I feel slightly disappointed that I haven't heard from Billy today, but it will be easier that way. With that we head out to the car.

The ride to the city is peaceful. _I hope I'm doing the right thing by moving to London._ I think to myself as I look out my window.

We arrive at a small café next to Donovan Decker. We have a seat at a table and place our order. "You know I'm going to miss you, right," Ben says taking a drink of tea.

"I'm going to miss you too, Ben. I promise I'll call you at least twice a week to let you know about everything that's going on in London," I vow to him.

Our food finally arrives and Ben digs in like he hasn't eaten in days. I sit and pick at mine not really in the mood to eat. I don't know if it's because I'm nervous about meeting with Gray or the fact that I won't be able to see Billy every day. Either was my appetite is gone. I wait for Ben to finish his meal and look at the clock. With a nervous sigh I say, "Well it's about that time. Wish me luck."

"I'll wait here for you okay. Good luck Jane," he tells me with a sympathetic smile.

I return his smile and put on a brave face as I walk out the door and over to Donovan Decker. I make my entrance and all eyes are on me. _Well it looks like the rumor mill has been hard at work. No thanks to India I'm sure. _I look over at her office and see her sitting at her desk staring at me with a triumphant smile plastered on her face. With my head held high I enter Gray's office.

"Sit down Jane," she orders.

I do as I'm told unable to look her in the eyes. I can feel her accusatory glare bore a hole into my forehead. "So tell me, exactly what were you doing at that high school play the other night? Don't even think about lying to me either," she demands in an icy tone.

I finally get up enough courage to look at her. "Well…I," I'm so nervous the words get stuck in my throat.

"I'm waiting Jane and you know I'm not a patient woman," she says with a little more irritation in her voice.

I sigh. "I was volunteered to do costumes for it," I spit out as quickly as I can just wanting to get this over with.

"Why would they volunteer you to do their designs? Do you know someone that works for the school," she asks with a knowing look in her eyes.

I don't even try to lie, "Yes I know a lot of people who work there because I'm a student."

She looks slightly shocked that I didn't try to lie my way out of trouble, "Yes, well obviously I already know that. So pack up our things you're done working here, but since you were truthful with me I'll see to it that no criminal charges are brought against you. Goodbye Jane." With that she dismisses me and goes about her business.

I slowly go to my desk and pack up what little I had there. "Aw to bad so sad, poor little Jane has to go back to teenage reality," I hear India comment from behind me.

"Yeah I guess you got what you wanted. That's okay though I already have a job offer," I reply unable to help the smile that spreads across my face. _Let's see how she handles hearing who offered it to me._

"Oh really from who, Baby Gap," she laughs.

"No I'm getting on an airplane to London at five. Jeremy asked me to be his partner on his line there and I accepted," I answer simply.

She stopped laughing immediately. Anger spreads across her face. She didn't say another word as she storms off to her office and slams the doors behind her.

_Well that's at least one small victory for today._ I think to myself as I walk out of the building and back to my brother.

"How'd it go in there," he asks as I approach.

"Their not taking any legal actions so I would say it went pretty well," I answer happily still caught up in my victory over India.

"At least you're in good spirits about it. Come on let's get you to the airport before you miss your flight," he says wrapping is arm around me and leads me to the car.

We arrive at the airport with an hour to spare. Ben helps me with my bags as I check-in. After I finish that process I grab my carry-on and walk to the line for security check. Ben wraps me in a big bear hug and kisses me on the forehead, "You take care of yourself over there okay. Remember you can always come back whenever you want." I can tell from his voice that he's going to cry.

"I will," I whimper.

He let's me go and wipes his eyes he's not big on emotional situations. With that we say our goodbyes. When Ben is gone from view I take my phone out of my purse and check to see if I've missed anything from Billy. I haven't heard a peep from him since yesterday and now is no different. I shut it off and stow it away in my purse defeated. _Lonely London here I come._

**Authors Note: I hope you all are enjoying my story. I just want to let all of you know that the next chapter is going to be from Billy's POV starting at the point where he drops Jane off at home. Much Love! Please review.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six: Love, Loss and Regret**

Billy's POV

I take off leaving Jane on her sidewalk to distracted and angry to say much of anything. _What the hell was I thinking? I can't believe I was so stupid. What am I going to do now that I've made everything such a mess? Ugh why do I have to be in love with her? She probably doesn't want to see me for a while. I'll just let things cool down for a few days and then try to apologize to her. Why did she kiss me back though? She can't possibly feel the same way I do. She would tell me, wouldn't she? I'm so confused._ I drive around till dawn trying to make sense of everything.

I spend my day at school in a daze. Not really noticing anything except that Jane and Ben didn't show up. _This is not good. Ben always shows up. He never let's her miss school unless something bad is going on._ "Hey stranger where have you been all day," I hear Zoe's voice coming from behind me.

I turn to face her and put on the best smile I can manage as she walks up greeting me with a kiss. My mind flashes back to the one I shared with Jane. How full of passion it was, like nothing I've ever felt before.

"Earth to Billy, what's up with you today? You seem so out of it," Zoe asks me while waving her hands in front of my face.

"Sorry Zoe I'm just worried about Jane," I answered truthfully.

"Why," she asks genuinely concerned.

"Well both her and Ben didn't show up today and that's not like them especially Ben," I reply.

"Have you tried calling or texting her," she questions.

"No. I think I'm just gonna to go over there after school and see what's going on," I say thankful that it's almost last period. I give Zoe a quick peck on the cheek and head off to my last class.

"Okay. Well call me later maybe we can do something together," I hear her yell as I walk down the hall.

"Yeah," I answer as I wave at her over my head.

Class drags by slowly and I can barely pay attention. _How am I going to fix this?_ A hundred scenarios play through my mind and none of them end well. _I'm so scared that I've already lost her._ I find myself watching the clock as the last few seconds tick by. I'm out of my set before the bell rings. I practically run to the parking lot and jump in the Beast.

I arrive at Jane's house in ten minutes and run up to the front door pounding on it like a lunatic. There's no answer and it's locked. I turn and finally notice that Ben's car is missing. I'm really starting to worry so I decide to text Ben.

To Ben:

Hey Ben is everything okay you guys missed school today.

A few minutes later my text alert pings.

To Billy:

Yeah everything is fine Jane's in her meeting with Gray at the moment.

Wait why are you texting me and not Jane?

_Oh boy what am I going to tell him?_

To Ben:

We kinda had a fight and I don't think she wants to talk to me now.

I was just worried about you two.

To Billy:

Well everything's fine.

However we need to have a talk when I get home alright.

I should be back in about an hour or two.

_Great Janie probably told him what happened. He's more than likely gonna kill me. Yep, I'm a dead man._

To Ben:

Um…okay I'll see you soon then.

To Billy:

Oh and one more thing.

I wouldn't try to contact Jane now she's still a little upset with you.

I stare at his last text as sadness courses through my body. _Wonderful! You really screwed up this time Nutter. _I think to myself as I slump back into the Beast. I text Zoe and let her know that I'm on my way over. _I'll tell her what happened between Janie and me eventually, but first I have to fix this._ I drive to Zoe's hoping she'll be able to take my mind off of things for at least a few hours.

I drive up to the front of her house and she meets me at the door. "Hey handsome," she smiles.

"What's up," I reply.

She wraps her arms around my neck and looks into my eyes, "Well my parents are out for a bit so I figured we could watch a movie and make-out."

I give her a lopsided smile and say, "Yeah sure sounds fun." In reality I don't want to kiss anyone except Jane, but if I say no she'll know something's up.

She takes my hand and leads me into her living room where I have a seat on the couch as she picks a random movie. She puts it in and sits next to me. She starts kissing me and I return it. I feel numb, there's no passion radiating from me like there was with Jane. I know she can tell something's not right as she breaks our kiss. "What the matter Billy," she asks.

"It's Jane," I sigh.

I can tell she's irritated as she asks, "What is it now?"

I rub my hands through my hair in remorse. I feel so guilty always putting Jane first and being in love with her. "Look Zoe I'm sorry it's just I haven't talked to Jane since last night. I was texting her brother earlier and he told me she doesn't want to talk to me for some reason. He also said that he needs to speak to me when he gets home. I'm worried and that's why I can't concentrate on kissing you now. My heads just not in the right place," I explain to her.

"It's okay I completely understand. I didn't know it was so serious," she says sympathetically.

I nod at her in agreement and check the time on my phone, "Ben should be home soon so I think I'm gonna go. I'm sorry Zoe, really."

"It's fine. Go find out what going on with Jane. You're not yourself without her. Besides we have all summer to spend together," she says as she walks me out to the car.

On my driver to the Quimby house I try to mentally prepare myself for the beat down Ben is going to give me. I pull up to the house and kill the engine. I sit there procrastinating not wanting to face the music. I look out the passenger window and see Ben standing on the porch with his arms crossed waiting for me. _This might be worse than I thought._ I climb out of the car and walk up the path that leads to the house.

"Hey Ben," I mumble walking past him.

"Billy," is the only greeting he has for me.

He closes the door behind him and takes a seat in the chair in the living room. I stand in the middle of the floor not knowing want to do. "Where's Jane," I ask nervously. Seeing her bedroom light is off.

"I think you should have a seat," he says avoiding my question.

I can feel my heart rate pick up as I sit down. I know something's wrong by the tone in his voice. _This is bad. This is really, really bad._ "I really don't know how to tell you this so I guess I'll just come out and say it. Billy, Jane is gone," he tells me softly.

My world starts to shatter around me. "Wait I don't understand, what do you mean she's gone," I ask. I can feel the lump in my throat growing. _What does that mean? Is she dead? I just talked to him a few hours ago and everything was fine. Oh God I can't live life without my Janie._

"No, no. Not gone like that. What I meant to say is she moved," Ben quickly answers realizing where my thoughts were headed.

I let out a sigh of relief and relax slightly. "Okay, so where'd she move to," I ask.

"London," he answers.

"London? As in London, England," I'm shocked. "But why would she move there? She didn't even say goodbye to me. I thought I meant more to her than that," I say as tears form in my eyes.

"I don't think you realize how much she does care about you. Look Billy I really shouldn't be telling you this. Jane left because she's in love with you. She loves you so much in fact, she moved all the way to London just to give you and Zoe a chance for happiness. She told me that she doesn't want to be the person that always comes between you and your girlfriend like she did with Lulu," he explains.

I run my hands through my hair trying to process what Ben's telling me. Then realization hits me. _Janie's in love with me. The girl I'm in love with loves me back._ I smile to myself. "Why didn't she just tell me," I ask.

"She's seen how happy you are with your girlfriend. She knows that you're falling for Zoe and Jane doesn't want to stand in the way of that," he tells me.

_Me falling for Zoe, ha not hardly. Well_ _I guess I thought there was something happening between us, but after that moment with Jane I know there's no one else._ "Ben, what Zoe and I have is nice, but I'm not in love with her. I'm in love with your sister. There will never be anyone but Janie for me," I confess to him.

"Why haven't you told her," he asks shaking his head in disbelief.

I explain, "I tried to once, but then this guy from her work showed up and I knew he was the better choice for her. I thought she would choose him over me. Plus I was afraid that I would ruin our friendship. I guess it's just a little too late to worry about that now."

"I wouldn't say it's too late, just give her some time to think. Do you honestly think that she'll be able to live without you? I don't," he says with a smile. "Just do your thing with Zoe or whatever and eventually Jane will come to her senses."

"Yeah I hope you're right," I reply.

"Well it's getting late I think I'm going to head off to bed," Ben says as he rises from his chair.

"Um… do you think it would be okay for me to crash in Jane's bed tonight," I ask.

"Sure she's not using it," he answers and walks into his room. "Oh one more thing Jane told me to tell you that the Beast is yours," he adds as he shuts the door behind him.

I enter Jane's room and turn on the light. Looking around I notice all the boxes packed up. Her room looks so empty now. The only thing she didn't pack was one photo of us together which was sitting on her nightstand. _I bet she left that here for me._ I rummage through my drawer in her dresser and find something to wear to bed. I notice a pair of my pants and a t-shirt are missing. _She took some of my stuff with her and she left me the Beast she really must love me. Things are looking up she'll, be back._ I lie in her bed and inhale deeply lavishing in the smell of my best friend. I drift off to sleep and dream of being with her.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven: My Time with Jeremy**

I've been in London for about two months and it's been fantastic. It's been so busy here between unpacking, helping Jeremy and sight-seeing that I've barely had any time to think about Billy. The only time he enters my thoughts is when I'm sleeping or talking to Ben. Like I am now, "Hey Ben, how are things going?"

"Everything here is great. I finally asked Rita to marry me and she has accepted. We are planning to have the wedding next summer. She wanted me to ask you if you would do her the honor of making her dress," he tells me and I know he's got a giant smile on his face.

"Ben that's amazing, congratulations! Let her know that I would love to make her dress for her I'll just need her measurements," I squeal with excitement.

"Thanks Jane she'll be so pleased when I tell her," he says.

We are silent for a moment as I contemplate if I should ask about Billy. My love for him gets the best of me and I ask, "So how is he?"

"He's okay Jane. Working a lot though since he wants to buy a motorcycle for some crazy reason," he answers.

"What that's so dangerous," I reply taken back by this news.

"Yeah he has gone a little crazy since you won't take his calls. Him and Zoe go out and party a lot together now. Why won't you just talk to him Jane," he asks.

"I just don't think I can handle it Ben, I'm so scared," I say biting my lips so I won't cry.

"He's headed down a bad path and Zoe doesn't seem to mind that much. I would say that she's enjoying his wild side a little too much, but that's your choice. You should really think about talking to him though," he tells me.

"I will," I lie.

"Well I need to get going Rita and I are going to meet up and book a place to hold the wedding and reception. I'll talk to you in a few days okay," he says and bids me farewell.

"Bye Ben," I say and hang-up my phone.

_Poor Billy, maybe I'm being selfish and didn't even realize it. I thought that he would be happy with Zoe and that she would take care of him. I guess I was wrong about her. Maybe I should call him and try to talk some sense into him. But what if he's mad at me for staying silent for so long, what if he hates me now?_ All these horrible thoughts are running through my head when I receive a call from Jeremy.

"Helo Jane I need you to meet me at the office in about twenty minutes okay," he starts before I have a chance to say hello.

"Okay," I reply softly fearing my voice would give away the hurt and worry that I'm feeling. It didn't work, he knows something's wrong.

"What's going on Jane are you alright," he sounds worried.

"I'm fine Jeremy just a little tired I didn't sleep well last night," I lie hoping he wouldn't see through me.

"Oh okay then, I'll see you in a bit," he says and hangs up the phone.

I leave my apartment as soon as I get off the phone with him wanting to pick-up some coffee before I have to go into work. I arrive exactly twenty minutes later with coffee in hand, plastering a fake smile on my face as I enter the office. Jeremy is the only one here and my smile changes to confusion. "Where's everyone else," I wonder out loud.

"Oh sorry I forget to tell you that it's just going to be you and me today, everyone else has other things to tend to outside of the office. I hope that's okay," he says looking up from the design he's sketching.

"Um… no that's fine I was just curious," I answer back. "So what are we working on today," I asking wanting to get started immediately so I can stop thinking about Billy.

"Right, so I thought we could start on the new evening dress today that we've been talking about," say showing me what he has designed so fare.

"Wow Jeremy it's looks amazing," I say pushing the thoughts of Billy to the back of my mind as I walk closer to Jeremy's drawing.

"Thanks, but I think it's missing something. What would you do to make this better," he asks my opinion as he places his hand on my arm.

I'm use to this kind of friendly gesture from him so I pay no attention. "Well I would add some lace along here," I begin showing him the few minor details that I would add to it.

"That's perfect Jane; you really are a fantastic designer. You have a keen eye for such little details and it always turns the designs into master pieces. I thought it would take at least until lunch to hash everything out with you, but you just make it so easy for me. Well, the only thing we can do now is wait for everyone to get back with the right material so we can bring this dress to life. How about you and me go grab a bit of breakfast while we wait," he asks cheerily.

He's paid me so many compliments in such a short time that I find it hard to refuse him. "Sounds good to me," I answer as he takes my arm and we walk out of the building. We don't go very far when we reach our destination. I can't help, but relax when I'm with him. I mean he's no Billy, but he's such a wonderful friend to me.

We have a seat at our usual table and he says, "So Jane I was wondering if you would like to join me for dinner this evening at my place."

"Sure," I answer not thinking twice about it. We've had dinner with friends almost every weekend so I just expected it to happen as usual.

"Great," he smiles.

We finish our meal and head back to the office along with everyone else. It takes us about six hours to complete the dress and send it off to be sewn together. We're sitting in the office admiring our work when Jeremy says, "You know I don't think this would have been the same without you here."

"Aw thanks Jeremy, it has been pretty wonderful these past few months. I love all the freedom I have here with the designs. You're such an easy person to get along with which makes it even better," I answer truthfully.

We go to our apartment building and head our separate ways. "I'll come and get you went dinner is ready Christian and Rebecca will be joining us as well, see you shortly," Jeremy says as he walks into his apartment across the hall from me.

_Aw, I love those two. I just wish they weren't so touchy feely with each other all the time it's uncomfortable and make me think about Billy. I mean I understand they're in love and all, but there's a time and a place to suck each others faces off and it's not a dinner._ I think to myself as I recall the last meal we shared with them. About an hour later there is a knock at my door. "Dinner is ready. Let's eat. I just hope those two can manage to keeps their hands to themselves tonight," Jeremy says as if he was reading my mind. We enjoy our meal as we laugh and joke over a bottle of wine. _Thank goodness they're being so tame tonight._ I think to myself as I smile knowingly at Jeremy trying to suppress my giggles at their cost. I said my good nights to everyone and went across the hall tired from work. I dress myself in Billy's clothes and drift off to my dreams of me and him.

I wake-up the next morning dreading the fact that it's Saturday. The weekend is my least favorite part of the week since I'm always alone, which means plenty of time to think about Billy. _I wish I could tell him about everything that's going on here. I think he would be really proud of me if we weren't on bad terms._ I think to myself as I make breakfast. _I wish things weren't so complicated between us. I wish things would just go back to normal._ While I'm in the middle of eating my phone rings.

"Good morning Jeremy," I answer.

"Helo sunshine how's your morning going," he greets.

"It's going I guess, just another lonely day at the apartment. What about you? The usual hoard of meetings and what-not," I ask making my gloomy mood clear.

"No actually I have the entire day to myself. That's the reason I'm calling you. I wanted to see if you would like to spend it with me. You know sight-seeing, shopping and so on," he replies.

_Shopping therapy I'm so on. That will defiantly get my mind off of Billy._ "You had me at shopping. What time do you want to go," I happily answer.

"Lovely! Just pop over when you're ready. See you soon," he ends the call.

I scarf down the rest of my breakfast and head off to the shower. Within a half an hour I'm ready to go. _That must be a record for me._ I think as I smile to myself walking out the door and knocking on Jeremy's. He answers it looking fantastic as usual. "You ready to go," I ask.

"I sure am. I figured we could head to the Inverness Street Market first. You'll love it there. There are so many interesting shops. Shall we," he says offering me his arm.

We arrive at the market after a short ride. _This is wonderful. I hope I don't go into shopper overload._ "Jeremy this is great I've never seen anything like it, thank you," I exclaim with utter happiness.

"I knew you'd love this. Come on let's do some shopping," he says taking my hand and escorts me to a shop.

We spend a few hours shopping. I found so many unique things to buy. We enter one last shop and I immediately think of Billy and my good mood vanishes. Every single item in this store is something I can see him in. I see a t-shirt hanging on a back wall that I can't help but buy it for him. _Maybe if I send this to him he'll know that I still think about and miss him._

We leave the market and as we do Jeremy asks, "Are you alright darling?"

"Yeah sorry, that shop just made me a little home sick," I reply sulkily.

"Well I have something planned that should take your mind off of home," he tells me.

We arrive at The London Eye. I mentioned wanting to go here about a month ago to him. _I can't believe he remembered._ I think to myself as my smile returns. "Jeremy you remembered," I say looking over at him.

"Of course I did. I remember everything you say Jane. Let's go it's about time to board. I've done something a little special for you on this stop," he replies.

"What do you mean, on this stop," I ask wondering what else he has planned.

"Well I have a few other things planned out for us, but let's enjoy this for now," he answers giving nothing away.

We walk past the line of people waiting to board and I ask, "Aren't we getting in line?"

"No Jane I reserved us a private capsule. I hope you don't mind," he says sounding a little concerned.

"It's fine," is all I can manage to say. We board the capsule and I find that there is champagne and food waiting for us.

"I thought it would be nice to do lunch with a view," he smiles. We sit and talk as he pours us both a flute of champagne. I take a drink and it's delicious. "So what do you think," he asks as we start to move.

"It's…," I don't know what to say so I shove some food in my mouth and nod. _It's romantic that's what it is._ We sit in silence eating our lunch as our capsule climbs to its peak. I look out and see the beauty of London. There's Big Ben, Buckingham Palace and Westminster Abbey. "It's beautiful," I find myself saying.

"It sure is," he says as I look over at him noticing that he's not looking at the view of London, but at me.

I look back out at the scenery and think to myself. _Oh great I hope he doesn't think this is a date. I mean Jeremy is a wonderful man, but I could never fell about him the way that I do about Billy. On the other hand maybe this is a good thing. Maybe Jeremy is the one man who could help me get over Billy. I mean he's back home enjoying his girlfriend so why shouldn't I try to do the same with some that cares about me?_ Our ride ends and we jump in a taxi. "Where to now," I ask.

"I can't tell you it's a surprise. As a matter of fact I want to put this over your eyes," he answers while taking his tie off. "You trust me right," he asks with hesitation.

"Of course I do," I answer reassuringly. I turn away from him allowing him to cover my eyes.

"Good I'm glade you feel that way," he whispers in my ear sending chills down my spine.

I feel the car stop and hear Jeremy exit. He opens my door and helps me out leading me to our next destination. "Can I take this thing off yet," I ask reaching to my eyes.

"No not yet just a little longer," he answers grabbing my hands. He leads me on to something metal and tells me to sit. I comply as we start to move. After a few minutes we come to a stop. He helps my down and puts his hands on my shoulders. "Okay now we can take it off," he says in my ear as he unties my blindfold.

The sun is blinding as I try to blink away the darkness. After a few moments I am able to focus and what a beautiful sight I behold. We are about a hundred feet above London in an enchanting garden. I've never seen anything like it before in my life. "Oh Jeremy this is absolutely breath taking," I whisper in awe. There are dozens of trees with a stream that leads to a small pond. In the pond I notice flamingos and ducks swimming around lazily. I feel Jeremy's hands rest on my shoulders from behind me. I turn to face him and ask, "Why are you doing all of this for me?"

A nervous look spreads across his face as he replies, "Well I really don't know how to explain it."

"Come on Jeremy this is me you're talking to. You know you can tell me anything," I tell him.

He looks into my eyes and says, "To be completely honest Jane when I look into you eyes it's like watching the night sky or a beautiful sunrise. There's so much they hold and it seems to me that I'm falling for you."

My mouth drops in surprise as I think to myself. _Oh boy, that is not the answer I was expecting. I don't know what to say to that. I'm not in love with him, but maybe I could come to one day._ I look up at him seeing that he's waiting for me to say something. "Jeremy I don't know what to say. You are a wonderful man intelligent, creative, sweet and handsome the list goes on. Everything a woman could ask for in a man, but I need time. I mean I really do like you but right now I don't think I can return your feelings maybe one day. As for right now it's just not the right time for me," I tell him softly as I watch his face fall.

"Well, just know that I won't give up on us Jane. I will do everything in my power to win you over," he replies with a smile and a twinkle in his beautiful blue eyes. When he realizes I have nothing to say in return he takes my hand and we stroll around the garden in silence enjoying the beauty of it. The sun was starting to set as we end our walk. "I'm a bit hungry, would you like to have some dinner before we head home," he asks hopefully.

"That would be nice," is all I say in return. There are too many thoughts running through my mind to hold a conversation with him. _I could love him one day maybe. I know he would do anything to make me happy I can see that much in his eyes. But right now my heart belongs to Billy I don't know if it could ever belong to anyone like it does to him. Yet his belongs to Zoe and I can't deny him that. I guess I'll just have to try and move on. Try to forget about my feelings for him._ I look over at Jeremy as I try to picture what life would be like with him. I finally come to a decision as we pull up to a boat docked letting on passengers. _Yes I think I will give Jeremy a chance what's the worse that could happen?_ "I thought you said we were going to have dinner," I ask him as we exit the taxi and head towards the boat.

"Yes that's why we're here. I thought it would be nice to enjoy a meal on the water," he answers.

"I believe it will be," I reply. We take our seats at a candle light table and Jeremy orders a bottle of wine. We browse our menus in silence and I notice him stealing glances at me every few minutes. After we place our orders I decide to ask, "So is this our first date?"

He quickly looks up with surprise on his face. "If you want it to be, I know I would like that very much," he says with a smile.

"Okay then a toast to our first date," I say as we bring our glasses together.

"May it be the first of many, so tell me Jane how did I do planning it," he asks with a broad smile.

I answer, "As far as first dates go I believe you went above and beyond the usual. It most defiantly is the best date I've ever been on that's for certain." His smile widens as our food arrives and we enjoy our meal talking like normal people on a first date.

"Well that was one of the best days I think I've ever had," Jeremy says smiling down at me standing at my apartment door.

I look down and blush as I reply, "Yeah it was pretty fantastic."

He puts his finger under my chin and tilts my head up so that I'm looking at him. He say, "And I hope there are many more to come." With those words he leans down and kisses me gentle.

A slight spark ignites in my heart which surprises me to the core and makes me pull away from him. "Jeremy I…," is all I can say.

"To soon wasn't it? I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that, but frankly I couldn't help myself," he says taking a step back.

"Yeah just a little too soon," I answer.

"Well then I bid you goodnight Ms. Quimby," he says bowing low at me.

I giggle at his comical gesture and curtsy in return saying, "Mr. Jones." We both laugh and say goodnight heading into our separate apartments. I close my door and lean against it bringing my fingers up to my lips. _What the hell was that? I didn't expect to feel like that when he kissed me. Still he's no Billy, but maybe there is hope for us to work. We'll just have to take it one day at a time._ With those thoughts I head off to bed and even with all that has happened today I still dream of Billy.

**Authors Note: Sorry to all my readers out there I know it's been awhile since my last post, but I've had a lot of family drama going on. So I hope you enjoyed this chapter and there will be much more to come. Please review and let me know what you think or you could just vent about how pissed you are that they canceled a great show like Jane by Design. Much love to you all!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight: Complications**

It's been about two weeks since Jeremy took me on our first date and surprisingly we have become extremely close. I lay in bed thinking about the time we've spent together and smile to myself. I stretch and decide to get up and make breakfast. It's Saturday morning and for the first time in two weeks I'll be spending the weekend alone since Jeremy has business to tend to out-of-town. After I finish with my breakfast I decide to tidy up my apartment. While cleaning and organizing my closet I come across the t-shirt I bought for Billy and my good mood vanishes. As I predicted Jeremy is able to prevent me from thinking about Billy most of the time. Only when I'm dreaming does he cross my mind. I sit and stare at the shirt contemplating weather or not to send it to him. I'm unsure since he hasn't tried calling me for some time. _I pray he isn't making a mess of his life because of me. I don't know if sending him this shirt will make things better or worse. I need to let him know that I do miss him. Yes I think I will send it to him today I just need to find the right words to send with it._ Then my phone rings bringing me back to reality. "Hello," I answer without checking who it is.

"Hey Jane, sorry I haven't called you in a while," I hear Ben's voice on the other side. "I've just been so busy with school and the wedding I haven't had time," I can tell he's smiling by the sound of his voice.

"That's fine, I completely understand. I've been pretty busy myself lately. It sounds like things are going well for you," I reply happy that Ben has found love.

"Yeah things here are almost perfect. Time seems to be going by so quickly. That's the main reason I'm calling you. I finally have Rita's measurements for her dress," he says.

_Almost perfect, I wonder what he means by that._ I think to myself as Ben gives me the measurements. "Okay, so is there anything specific that Ms. Shaw wants done to her dress," I ask.

"No she knows that you will make it perfect for her," he answers.

He gets oddly quiet after that which makes me feel uneasy for some reason. "Something's up isn't it Ben? What aren't you telling me," I ask him nervously.

"I really don't want to tell you this, but I think we're losing Billy. I mean he's stopped coming to school, he barely ever comes around here anymore and every time I see him it seems like he's always drunk. I just don't know what to do to bring him back to himself. I'm really worried about him Jane," Ben explains to me.

"It doesn't sound good does it? I was actually thinking about mailing him something. Do you think it would be a good idea," I ask wanting his opinion more than anything.

He's silent for a moment then answers, "I think that you should. Maybe that will make him happy to know that you still think of him. Maybe it will make him see sense."

"You're right I think I'll send it out today. And Monday I'll get started on Rita's dress," I tell him.

"Wonderful! Well I have to get going I'll talk to you soon," he bids me farewell.

_Right, now I need to find the perfect thing to say to Billy._ I pace around my apartment wracking my brain trying to find the right words to send to him. I sit down at my desk and take out a sheet of paper.

Dear Billy,

First off let me start by telling you how sorry I am for leaving you without so much as a goodbye. It was very selfish and extremely unkind of me. I just want to tell you that you are not the reason I left. I had a lot on my mind what with Gray firing me and I just had to get away. Jeremy offered me a job that I couldn't deny. I know that's no excuse for leaving like I did, but I wasn't thinking clearly. Also the reason I haven't taken any of your calls is that I know you would have talked me into coming back, but I have to do this to see how far my talent will take me. I hope you are able to understand why I did this and I hope that one day you can forgive me. Here is a little something to show you that I still think of you and that I miss you everyday. Please stay safe and by the way…get your butt back to school you don't want to ruin your life-like that.

Always Thinking of You,

Janie

I re-read the letter a few times and nod my head with satisfaction. _Perfect! I hope this does some good and that he'll accept my apology._ I load everything in the package and quickly scribble the address on it. I make my way to my post box only to hesitate putting it in. _Why am I so nervous? Get a grip Jane._ With that thought I place the package in the box. I head back to my apartment feeling a little better when I receive a text from Jeremy.

To: Jane

You know I'm finding it extremely hard to concentrate without you here with me.

I smile as I read it and text him back.

To: Jeremy

Aw, that's so sweet.

I have to admit I'm missing your company as well.

When do you think you'll be back?

I would really like you to help me with Rita's wedding dress.

To: Jane

Well I'm glade you are feeling the same way I am.

I should arrive back home early tomorrow evening.

I would be more than delighted to work on anything with you when I return.

Maybe I'll stop and pick us up some dinner on my way back.

To Jeremy:

That would be most appreciated.

I think I'll go ahead and get started just to make time go by faster.

I can't wait to see you.

To: Jane

I'll be counting the seconds, love.

See you soon.

I shut my phone ending our conversation and I realize I have a ridiculous smile plastered all over my face. _I'm so glade I decided to give us a chance. He's been so wonderful to me even before I came to London. I don't know why I've never noticed it before._ I think to myself as I take a seat at my desk and take out a fresh sketch pad to start on Rita's dress. I work on it well into the nigh only stopping to eat or use the restroom. I decide that I need to get some sleep so I make my way off to bed. Even though Jeremy keeps my mind off of Billy my dreams are still haunted by him after all this time.

I awake around noon the next day. _Wow I must have been more tired than I thought I was. _I think to myself as I stretch out my stiff muscles. I do my normal morning routine and then take a seat at my desk once more continuing my work. When I finish I have a gorgeous, Hollywood glamour gown that is an A-line cut with a chapel train and a low, draped back. I decide that I want to make it completely out of silk and I am very happy with the end results.

I look at the time and realize that Jeremy should be home any minute. With that thought I hear a knock on my door. I open it and there is Jeremy holding up take-out bags with a big smile on his face. I let him enter and he places the food down on the table before returning to me. He takes me in his arms and dips me low bringing his lips down to mine. I kiss him back this time and again I feel that tiny spark inside me. He brings me back to standing position, but still holds me close and I ask, "You didn't miss me or anything did you?"

He chuckles and replies, "More than you'll ever know."

I smile warmly at him and say, "I missed you too, now shall we eat I'm starving?" We take our seats and dig in as I enjoy listening to Jeremy tell me all about his trip. After we eat our fill I ask him if he would like to take a look at my design.

"Jane this is absolutely brilliant. I knew you wouldn't need my help designing it," he says praising my work.

"I guess, but I still like getting your opinion on it, and I still need you to help me make it," I say in return.

We spend the next few weeks together after work piecing it together. We finally finish it and I call Ben to let him know. "Hey I just wanted to tell you that the dress is done. All that's left to do is the fitting," I tell him.

"That's great Jane, wow you work fast. I've been meaning to tell you that Rita asked me to ask you if you would come in and handle her fitting personally. She doesn't trust anyone else to do it plus it would be nice to see you," he says and I can hear the pleading in his voice.

My heart shoots down to my stomach at the thought of going home. _What if I run into Billy? What am I suppose to say to him? I know he must have received his package, but I haven't heard anything from him. On the other hand Rita is the bride and I want to make sure she's happy and it would be nice to see Ben. I guess I'll just have to suck it up and go._ I let out a sigh and answer, "Fine."

"Thank you Jane, it means a lot to both of us. So when should I tell her you'll be here," he asks brightly.

"It'll have to wait until the weekend. I'll try and get Friday off, but no promises," I answer.

"Great just let me know. I'll see you this weekend," he says.

"Oh and Ben, please don't tell Billy about this okay," I tell him.

"Alright," is all he says as he ends our call.

As I close my phone Jeremy enters the room and I plant a fake smile on my face. "So what did your brother have to say," he asks as he comes closer with two glasses of wine in hands.

"Well, it looks like I'll be needing to buy a plane ticket tomorrow," I tell him pretending I'm excited.

I notice his face fall slightly as he asks, "What do you mean?"

"Rita wants me to be there for her fitting just in case something needs altered. She doesn't want anyone else working on it," I answer.

He hands me a glass of wine and shakes off whatever is bothering him. Smiling he says, "Well I believe this is a cause for celebration. We finished the dress and now you get to see your brother. When do you want to leave?"

I take a sip from my glass and answer, "I was hoping to leave Friday morning and return early Sunday evening if my hard ass boss will give me the day off."

He laughs at my comment and says, "I don't think you have to worry about him. Besides you're partner in this so you get to do as you wish."

"Well then I guess I'll be leaving Friday morning. Oh there is something I wanted to ask you," I say coyly.

He looks up at me quizzically, "What's that?"

"I was just wondering if you would like to join me this weekend. You know, formally meet my brother and all that good stuff," I ask genuinely.

I notice his eyes widen in shock as he answers, "Really, you want me to come with you? That would be amazing I would love to." The next day we buy our tickets and head back to my home town. We arrive in the early evening and take a taxi to my house.

Ben greets us on the front porch, "Jane it's so great to see you. I've actually kind of missed you." He gives me a big bear hug and then releases me to shake Jeremy's hand. "Jeremy isn't it? It's nice to meet you. I take it that you've been taking good care of my little sister," he asks slightly over protective.

"I most certainly have been. She's actually been my savior with my fashion line. I don't know what I would do without her," he replies looking at me admiringly.

I see that Ben takes notice and I tell him, "Ben please be nice to my boyfriend."

I watch as both their mouths hang open in surprise. I never got around to telling Ben about our relationship and I have never verbally acknowledged Jeremy as my boyfriend to anyone. Ben recovers first and says, "Boyfriend, is that so? Well then you better really take care of her now and don't even think about breaking her heart or you'll have me to deal with."

"Believe me Ben I wouldn't dream of hurting her. If anyone is going to break a heart she will break mine because I don't plan on going anywhere," he tells Ben as he takes my hand.

_Wow this is getting awkward._ I think to myself before asking, "Where's Rita?" With that question my brothers' attitude changes.

"She's inside, come on she has been dying to see you and her dress," he answers happily as he leads us into the house.

"Rita," I exclaim when I see her as I run and give her a hug.

"Hello Jane, I'm so happy you're here. How was your flight," she says with a smile hugging me back.

"It was fine. So tell me would you like to see your dress," I ask.

"I thought you'd never ask," she replies while I lead her into my bedroom.

"You two stay out here and play nice. Ben that means you," I yell over my shoulder as I close my door. When I turn to face Rita all the old memories of Billy and me come flooding back. My heart sinks to the floor as I think of him.

"Are you alright Jane," she asks me concerned at how fast my mood changed.

"Yes, of course I am," I reply unconvincingly.

"It's Billy isn't it," she says knowing me too well. "Ben told me everything that happened between you two," she admits.

"It's just been really hard without him in my life. I miss him more than words can say. It really doesn't matter though. He has Zoe and I'm with Jeremy," I tell her.

"That may be so, but are you in love with Jeremy," she asks.

I look down a little ashamed as I say, "He keeps me from thinking about Billy and he loves me."

"You didn't answer my question," she replies sternly.

I sigh, "No I don't, but maybe one day I can."

Rita sits down on my bed and gestures for me to sit next to her. "Jane I really hate to tell you this, but what you're doing to that man is wrong. I understand that it's hard for you to see Billy with someone else, but using Jeremy to help you heel will not make you love Billy any less. Those feelings will never go away. To be completely honest as strong as your love is for him I don't think your heart has any room for Jeremy," she says.

"So what am I suppose to do," I ask hopelessly.

"I believe in my heart that you should go and talk to Billy. Tell him how you really feel. You'll never know the truth about how he feels until you talk to him. I know it will be hard for you, but if he returns your affections you can't keep stringing Jeremy along. You owe that much to them and to yourself," she advises me.

I contemplate what she says and decide she's right in more ways than one. I tell her that I'll talk to Billy tonight and change the subject to her dress. I carefully take it out of the garment bag and watch as her face lights up with joy. "Jane this is the most beautiful dress I have ever seen. It's perfect, thank you," she says as tears of happiness fall down her cheeks. All I can do is smile at her as I hand her the dress. I exit my room giving her some privacy to try it on. I turn and look at Jeremy, who is smiling up at me from the couch and a wave of guilt rolls through my body.

Does she like it," he asks happily.

"She loves it," is all I say.

We finish her fitting within an hour. The sleeves were slightly too long, but other than that it fit her perfectly. Rita decides to make dinner for all of us. We sit around the table laughing and joking like a normal family would. I help Rita clear the table and we make our way into the kitchen to wash the dishes. "So are you still going to talk to Billy tonight? If you are I'll cover for you," she asks me not taking her eyes off the soapy water before her.

"Um…I think I'm going to wait until tomorrow. It was such a nice evening, I don't want to ruin it," I admit to her. With that she quickly changes the subject back to the wedding plans.

It is starting to get late so we all decide to go to bed. "I like you and all Jeremy, but you will be sleeping out here on the couch," I hear my brother's voice coming from the living room.

"I wouldn't dream of sleeping anywhere else," he replies. I just shake my head and roll my eyes as I change into my pajamas.

I walk back out into the living room and say my goodnight to everyone. I give Jeremy a quick peck on his cheek and notice the disapproving looks on Ben and Rita's faces. I head back into my room and shut the door behind me.

_I know what I'm doing is wrong, but Jeremy soothes the pain in my heart. I don't want to hurt him by telling him he has no chance of winning my love like Billy. I knew coming back here was a bad idea, but I had no clue it would make me feel so guilty._ I turn the lights out and lay in bed mauling over my thoughts. Eventually I fall asleep only to be awoken by someone climbing into bed with me. I shoot upright in bed and now I'm face to face with the one person I've been dreading and longing to see. "Billy," I whisper in astonishment.

"Jane," he replies coldly.

"What are you doing here," I ask still trying to recover from the shock.

"I didn't expect you to be here," there's no warmth in his voice.

We sit in silence for a few moments before I can manage to find my voice, "Billy I'm so…"

"Save it Jane," he cuts me off.

"Did you get my letter," is the only thing I could think to say.

He chuckles at me with no humor and his warm breath hits my face. It's only then that I detect the smell of alcohol. "Yeah, I got your pathetic little letter. Do you really that it would fix us? What you did to me is unforgivable. You were suppose to be my best friend and for you to put me through that…I can barely stand to look at you," his words cut me like a knife.

"Billy I don't…," I try to say, but get cut off once more.

"Jesus, Jane I was in love with you. Then you just disappear into thin air leaving me to think that I was the reason for it. I know you didn't leave just because Gray fired you. You kissed me back that day at the falls. I know you felt something and then poof you're gone. Look I have to go I shouldn't have come here," I hear the sorrow and bitterness in his voice.

With tears running freely down my face I grab his arm, "Billy, please."

He pulls his arm out of my hand and shouts, "The time for talking is over!" He quickly grabs me up in his arms and kisses me roughly trailing his lips up and down my neck and back to my face. He releases me and pushes me down onto my bed and says, "I'm over this!"

As he turns to leave Ben, Rita and Jeremy barge into my room. Ben turns on the light and immediately Jeremy notices I'm crying. _Oh this is going to be bad._ I think to myself right before Jeremy yells, "What the bloody hell did you do to her!" Jeremy lunges for Billy, but Ben is there to stop him.

"This is who you settle for, I should have known," Billy snaps as he exits through my window.

After all that drama I am so grateful to be back in London, but now my wounds from Billy are fresh and my attitude towards Jeremy has changed. He's been nothing but nice and understanding throughout the ordeal, yet I can't stand him touching me. Everything that Billy had said and did to me is playing over and over in my mind. _He said he was in love with me. To think if I would have stayed things would be so different, I would be truly happy._ I am so miserable I never want to leave my bed again. _I have to fix this._ With that thought I drift off to sleep and dream of what could have been.

Monday morning comes and goes in a blur. I find myself unable to concentrate on anything. "Jane…Jane," Jeremy's voice brings me back to the present.

"Sorry, what did you say," I ask him in a daze.

"I was just telling you that I have to leave town again on business tomorrow. I am also planning on giving you the rest of the week off. You really haven't been yourself since we got back and I think you need a break," he tells me.

"I know, I'm sorry I just have a lot on my mind," I answer sadly.

He smiles at me knowingly and says, "It's okay love, I understand. That's why I'm giving you some time off. When I get back on Friday I really need you with me to start these new designs."

The next morning Jeremy comes to my apartment to tell me goodbye. He kisses me on the cheek and I notice the spark is gone. "I need you to get some rest, okay? Also while I'm gone would you please check my mail for me? You can put it on my table in the kitchen. Here's the key to my apartment and I'll call you when I arrive at the hotel," he says handing me his key.

"Sure, have a safe trip," I say giving him a halfhearted smile.

By Thursday I'm starting to feel a little like my old self again. After I eat my breakfast and take a shower I decide to collect Jeremy's mail. I head down to his box and grab the mail making my way back up to his apartment. I open the door and place his mail on the kitchen table when I hear a clatter come from his bedroom. "Hello," I say thinking maybe he came back early, but there is no answer. I shrug it off and start for the door when I hear it again.

Curiosity gets the better of me and I head into his room. "Hello is anyone here," I ask as I look around his room. Then I see what's making all the noise and my blood runs cold. Sitting in the corner chair is a disheveled India. She looks awful, nothing like the woman I use to know. Her clothes are a mess like she's been wearing them for weeks and her hair is greasy. _My goodness what happened to her? Why is she here?_ I think to myself not moving any closer. "India what are you doing here? How did you get in," I ask nervously.

A cruel smile spreads across her face as she says, "Well, well if it isn't the little bitch that ruined my life."

I'm a little taken back by her words, but I ask, "How did I ruin your life?"

Her expression is one of hate as she answers, "After you were fired Gray went nuts. Nothing I did was good enough. She was always comparing my work with yours. Eventually the company failed and Gray of course blamed me. Now I can't get work anywhere. To top it all off you are doing the job that Jeremy promised me and you are with him when it should be me. Perfect little Jane, what the hell does he see in you anyway? You are just a child, why does he choose you over me?" She rises from her seat and I notice the glint of a pistol in her dirty hand.

I am frozen with fear and yet I still manage to ask, "How is all of that my fault?"

"It doesn't matter now. Everything is about to change for both of us. Once you're gone my life will get better. Jeremy with realize that he wants me not you and my life will be wonderful once more," she says as she raises the gun in my direction.

"India, please…," I whisper in fear.

"Goodbye Jane," she says smiling wickedly. I turn to run and I hear a loud pop there's a sharp pain and then there is nothing but darkness.

**Authors Note: Well I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think. Also I just wanted to say thank you to those of you that have left me reviews it means a lot and makes me want to continue writing. The next chapter will however be from Billy's point of view. Much Love.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine: Billy's Broken Heart**

It has been almost three months since I have seen Jane. She won't take my calls and refuses to answer my texts. I decided about a month ago to stop trying. Now I spend most of my days drowning my sorrows in whiskey and spending time with Zoe. I never realized it before, but Jane is like the glue that holds me together and without her my life means nothing to me anymore. I hear a knock at my front door, it's around eleven so I climb out of bed and answer it. To my surprise it's the mailman with a package for me. I stand there gaping at it like an idiot because it's from Jane. "Um…you'll need to sign here please," the man says snapping me out of my daze.

"Sorry," I reply as I sign the form. I close the door behind me and head back into my room. _After all this time she decides to send me something instead of calling me. What kind of lame crap is that?_ I think to myself a little irritated as I open the package. Inside is an awesome shirt that only Jane would know to buy me. _God it's so irritating how well she knows me._ I think as I notice an envelope resting on the bottom of the box. I hesitate before opening it, nervous at the thought of what it might say after all this time. _All I know is that it better be good after what she put me through._ I think while I rip it open and begin to read.

After I finish reading my emotions are so mixed up I don't know which way is up. I'm pissed because I know she's not telling me the truth about why she left and yet my heart is soaring to know that she's always thinking about me. Anger steamrolls it's way over my heart, I take everything and throw it in my trash. _I gotta get out of here._ With that thought I text Zoe.

**To: Zoe**

**Hey, what are you doing?**

**To: Billy**

**Just hanging around my house waiting for my parents to take off.**

**Why what's up?**

**To: Zoe**

**Nothing just want to spend some time with you.**

**Maybe drink a few whiskeys.**

**Are you up for that?**

**To: Billy**

**Most defiantly!**

**I was actually thinking about having a party tonight since my parents will be gone all weekend.**

**To: Zoe**

**Sweet, when will they be leaving?**

**To: Billy**

**Any minute.**

**So you can head on over now and they'll be gone by the time you get here.**

I end the conversation and shut my phone. I grab some clothes and throw them on, with one more look at my trash I grab the keys to my motorcycle and head to Zoe's. About ten minutes later I arrive at her house and her parents are nowhere to be found. She meets me on her porch wraps her arms around me and leans up to kiss me. I kiss her back only out of habit. I realized when Jane left that the only reason I'm with Zoe is because I can't have Jane. The only reason I'm still with her is she helps with the emptiness that I feel.

We make our way into her house and I head straight for her parents bar. I make myself a glass of whiskey and ask her, "Do you want anything?"

"Sure I'll have whatever you're having," she answers from the couch.

I pour her a glass and walk over to her handing her the drink. "So when does the party start," I ask taking a seat next to her.

"People should be arriving any second," as she finishes her sentence the doorbell rings.

The party is in full swing by three o'clock. There is close to fifty people drinking, dancing and swimming in her backyard. I'm sitting under her canopy finishing off my fifth drink as I watch her play hostess. I notice her paying more attention to one group of guys than anyone else. She keeps touching and flirting with one guy that I've never seen before. To my surprise it doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would. I continue drinking and sulking well into the evening. All my thoughts are about Jane no matter how hard I try to push her out of my mind.

Eventually the party starts to die down and Zoe decides to grace me with her presence. I can tell she's pretty wasted when she starts hanging all over me and kissing me sloppily. She whispers in my ear with a slur, "Let's go up to my room." She takes my hand and leads me up the stairs clumsily. We make it into her room and she shoves me down on the bed jumping on top of me. She kisses me hungrily letting me know what she wants by grinding her body on mine. All the while I'm still thinking about Jane and the letter she sent me.

I push Zoe off of me and say, "I can't do this."

She sits up and looks at me with disappointment on her face. "What do you mean you can't do this? You've never had any problems before. What is with you today? You've been sulking a lot more that usual," she says with frustration in her voice.

"I got a package in the mail today…from Jane," I answer truthfully.

I can tell that really pisses her of as she starts yelling, "Well that's just freaking great! Why can't she just leave and stay gone?! I thought we finally got rid of her! Things just started going good for us and she pulls this crap! God, she's such a little bitch!"

The more Zoe rants the angrier I get; when she finishes my hands are clinched into fists. "Don't you ever talk about her like that again. Do you understand me," I tell her in a whisper.

"Whatever Billy, I thought you were over this whole Jane thing," she snaps back at me.

"You don't seem to get it; I'll never be fully over her. If you can't deal with that then maybe you should find someone else to be with. Maybe that looser you couldn't drag yourself away from at the party," I snarl back at her.

I can tell that my words wound her. "You really think that I would choose him over you? After everything that I've put up with between you and Jane," she asks me.

"I really don't know. Look I gotta go, I'll call you later once I get my head straight," I answer as I leave her sitting on her bed.

I get on my bike and drive around for about an hour just thinking. _This is ridiculous, why do I always let Jane get the better of me. I mean I know I'm still in love with her even after everything that's happened, but I have to find a way to move on. I'm pretty sure that it's impossible to get over someone who you love so completely like I do. I just wish I had someone to turn to for advice about this._ I finally give up on trying to figure things out when I realize that I'm heading to Jane's house without even thinking about it.

I keep on driving knowing that as much as I wish it, she won't be there. I decide that I should go home and get some sleep. I park in my driveway and make my way into my house. I walk past my brother, who for whatever reason is asleep on the couch and head into my room closing the door behind me. I look into my trash at the things Jane sent me and quickly take them back out. I sit on my bed and put the shirt down next to me as I reread that letter.

_I just don't understand, she says that she's always thinking about me and yet she leaves me. It can't be just because of Gray. I know it has something to do with me and that day at the falls. I know she felt something, but what? Maybe she's in love with me too and that scared her so much that she had to leave. Yeah right, she only sees me as her best friend. That's just wishful thinking. One way or another I have to find out the real reason she left, even if it kills me._ With that last thought I put the letter in my nightstand and take a better look at the shirt. As I pick it up a hint of her perfume hits my nose. I pull it close to my face and inhale deeply and her smell makes me lose it. I let silent tears roll down my face as I think about how much I miss her. The tears keep flowing as I fall asleep and dream of her like I've done every night for as long as I can remember.

Over the next few days I'm in an irritable funk. "Hey bro, you need to wake up," I hear Tommy's voice rousing me from my dreams.

"What do you want man," I grumble.

"You need to get up and clean up the house for me," he answers.

I turn over and glare at him coldly. "What do you mean I need to clean the house? Do I have maid written on my forehead? What's the matter with you, are your arms broken? Do it yourself," I say angrily.

"Dude, what the hell is your problem? It's freaking six o'clock at night; you've been sleeping all day. You need to get your ass up and clean the house. I have a chick coming over later and I don't want her thinking I'm a slob," he retorts.

I finally sit up and tell him, "I don't give a shit if you have a playboy bunny coming over I'm not cleaning up after you. You're a grown ass man, do it yourself!"

He grabs me by my arm and attempts to pull me out of bed. All I see is red and I swing at him knocking him out cold. I get out of bed and put some clothes on. I head into the kitchen grab my keys and a bottle of whiskey as I make my way out the door. I mount my bike and drive off to the park where I spent most of my time as a child with Jane. I down the half a bottle of whiskey as I wallow in my misery, when the alcohol finally kicks in I decide that I probably shouldn't go home tonight. I really don't feel like seeing Zoe either. So that leaves me with only one more option and that would be crashing at Jane's.

It's pretty late when I arrive and thankfully all the lights are off. I make my way around to Jane's window and climb in like I've done so many times before. I close the window and turn towards her bed expecting it to be empty. I freeze in my tracks noticing that it's not. I take a step back towards the window thinking that Ben and Rita have a house guest. The person in the bed rolls over and the moonlight hits her face revealing that it's Jane. At first I think I'm imagining things, but then she whispers in her sleep, "Billy." She smiles as she dreams and I almost crumble to my knees.

I sit in the chair next to her bed and watch her as I think to myself. _She's dreaming about me. I wonder what she's dreaming about._ My happy thoughts are short-lived as anger creeps over me. _Why didn't anyone tell me she was coming home? Didn't anyone think that I might like to see her while she's here? Maybe she didn't want me to know she's was coming into town._ I'm angry with her and yet I can't stop myself from climbing into bed with her.

As soon as I'm lying next to her she shoots up and whispers my name as if she thinks she's still dreaming. My name on her lips makes my heart melt, but I'm not going to make this easy on her. "Jane," I reply coldly. I think she's a little shocked and she wants to know why I'm here. "I didn't think you would be here," I answer truthfully. She begins to apologize, but I cut her off knowing that she would break down my icy resolve. She doesn't now what to say since I'm being so cold to her. She finally decides to ask about the package. Anger bubbles up inside me, I don't know if it's the whiskey or that she left me. Hurtful words spew from my mouth before I can stop them.

She tries to apologize once more and it breaks me. I find myself confessing, "Jesus, Jane I was in love with you." I continue ranting about how I feel and I make sure to use past-tense so she won't figure out that I still love her. I get up to leave knowing that my words are making her cry, but she grabs my arm and says, "Billy, please."

Her touch electrifies my whole body and it shocks me to the core. I push her down on the bed and devour her lips. I can't help myself from running a trail down her neck and back to her mouth once more. _God, I love her so much. I need her, I want her. No, what the hell am I doing._ Angry with myself I pull away from her and find myself yelling, "The time for talking is over! You ignored me for too long! I'm over this!" Those words are the biggest lie I've ever told.

As I turn to leave in barges Ben, Rita and that Jeremy guy. My heart sinks when I see him as I think to myself. _I just made a complete fool of myself. She's here with him. I knew she would choose him over me_. He yells something at me, but I don't hear him. I just look over at Jane's tear stained face and broken-hearted I say, "This is who you settle for, I should have known."

I go back to my house not caring about what my brother will say or do. All I want to do is crawl in my bed and die. My heart hurts so much I can barely walk into my house. Tommy must hear me come in because he meets me at my bedroom door. He looks pretty pissed off and his eye is almost swollen shut. "You have a lot of balls coming back here after sucker punching me in the face," he snarls at me.

"Look I'm sorry about that, but I have a lot of shit going on with me right now and I really don't feel like doing this," I reply in a daze. My mind is still back in Jane's room along with my heart.

Tommy looks at me with confusion on his face. He opens his mouth to say something, but decides against it. He turns and leaves me to wade in my sadness. I don't even want to think about tonight anymore so I lie in my bed and drift off to sleep. Unfortunately the events of the evening are all I dream about.

A few days later I drive by Jane's house to apologize for all the mean things I said to her. I walk up on her porch and knock on the front door. It opens and Ben greats me sternly, "Billy."

I rub the back of my head with my hand nervously, unsure what to say. "Hey Ben, how's it going," is the only thing I can manage.

"Oh things are just peachy around here except for the face that Jane left early because of your outburst," he replies smugly.

"Yeah…about that, look Ben I'm sorry for acting like a fool. I must admit what I did was uncalled for, but the way I feel about your sister is driving me crazy. I guess the saying love makes you do crazy things is true," I tell him embarrassed of my behavior.

"It's fine Billy, but I think you should come in we need to have a talk," he says as he steps aside to let me in.

I take a seat on the couch and rub my sweaty palms on my legs. "So she really left early because of me," I ask.

"That doesn't matter right now. I want to talk to you about what happened between you two the other night," he answers.

"Okay…what about it," I ask nervously wondering what Jane told him.

"Well first off…what were you thinking coming here and yelling at her like some kind of nut? Secondly, she told me everything you said to her and to me it seemed pretty harsh. I mean even after everything that has happened between you and her do you really think she deserved the things you said? Did you think that yelling at her and venting like you did would help the situation," he says seeming rather irritated.

I sigh as I put my face in my hands with embarrassment and reply, "I honestly don't know what I was thinking. I just didn't want to make things easy for her after what she did. Now that I look back on the things I said to her I'm ashamed of myself. That's why I came over actually, to tell her how sorry I am. All I know is that I love her and I've lost my chance with her since she's with Jeremy."

Ben eases off of me a little realizing how torn up I am about everything. "Look Billy, I can't say that I know how you feel because I don't, but what can tell you is that this thing between Jane and Jeremy won't last. I've been around them enough to know that there's no chemistry between them. I mean Jeremy is completely taken by her, but Jane doesn't have her heart in that relationship believe me," he tells me with a knowing smile. "I'm not telling you to give up and I'm not telling you to move on, but I will tell you that you need to give her the space that she needs. Eventually she will come back and you can make amends."

"But how do you know she'll come back," I ask skeptically.

"If you would have seen her after you left the other night you would understand, just trust me on this she'll be back," he assures me. "One other thing…you really need to get your act together if you expect me to let you date my little sister."

For some reason his words gave my heart a little spark of hope for the future. I smile at him and say, "Thanks, Ben. I really needed someone to talk to." I stand and head for the door.

I hear Ben's voice come from behind me, "I'll always be here." I turn and smile at him as I leave.

I drive around for a while thinking about everything Ben said to me. _Maybe he is right maybe she will come back to me. I should have given her the space she needed the first time. I just hope she'll be able to forgive me for the things I said. I do know two things for sure. One I need to quit messing up my life like Ben said. Two I have to dump Zoe. I know it will hurt her, but I'll never be happy with her._ With that I head in the direction of Zoe's house.

I pull into her driveway and a disheveled; panting Zoe meets me at the front door. Her shirt is buttoned up wrong, her hair is a mess and her lipstick is smeared across her face. Surprisingly I let out a sigh of relief. "Billy what are you doing here," she asks seeming flustered.

I decided to have a little fun with her since she's giving me such an easy out. I smile sweetly at her and say, "I just wanted to come and visit my beautiful girlfriend."

"Oh…really that's so sweet. I wish you would have called first," she says faking a smile.

"So …are you going to invite me in," I ask toying with her.

She bites her lip nervously and replies, "Now is really not a good time."

I smile at her as I take her hands and say, "Why not it doesn't look like your parents are home." I lead her into the house knowing full well what I'm going to find.

There standing half-naked in the middle of her living room is the guy from her party. "Billy I can explain," I hear Zoe stutter from behind me.

I can't help myself from busting out in laughter. I turn to her and say, "Well I see you took my advice."

A look of confusion spreads across her face as she says, "What you're not mad?"

"Not really since I drove over here to break-up with you," I answer with a chuckle.

"Wait…what," she asks in shock.

"Look Zoe…I can't be with you because I'll never be truly happy. I'm in love with Jane and I always will be. Besides you're most defiantly not in love with me or you wouldn't be here doing whatever it was you were doing. Really I think I'm doing us both a favor," I tell her truthfully. I finish my sentence and my phone rings.

"Hello," I answer.

"Billy it's Ben…look you need to meet me at the airport. Bring your passport with you," he tells me frantically.

My heart-rate picks up with fear. "Wait Ben slow down and tell me what's going on," I tell him with panic in my voice.

"Jane's been shot," he wails.

I drop my phone in shock as I fall to my knees. With those words it seems like my whole world is ending. "Billy…Billy," I hear Ben yell.

I quickly pick up my phone and ask him, "Is she alive?"

"Yes thank God, but we have to go. I have to find out what happened. I have to be there for her and I need you there with me, please," I hear the agony in his voice.

"I'll meet you there," is all I say as I end the call. I spring up off the floor and walk out Zoe's door not even looking at her. _Please God, let her be alright. I can't handle losing her for good._ With thoughts of Jane lying dead in her hospital bed I get on my bike and race towards the airport. I'm half way there when it begins to rain and I find myself crying. I close my eyes to blink away the tears and I hear the sound of screeching tires. I open my eyes long enough to see a Jeep heading right at me and then there's nothing.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten: Recovery and Betrayal**

The annoying beeping sound of my alarm wakes me and I reach to shut it off as a searing pain shoots through my chest. My eyes spring open in panic as I remember the events of the day. I take in my surroundings realizing that I am in a hospital bed and the beeping sound is coming from a monitor sitting next to me. I finally notice my brother sleeping awkwardly in a chair. I decide not to disturb him as I examine the damage that was done. I look at my chest and find a thick gauze bandage with a hint of blood seeping through. I start to feel queasy as the thought of India pointing a gun at me runs across my mind. I start to move around a little to try to measure the amount of pain I'm going to be in. I hiss my breath in through my teeth as a burning ache courses from my back to my chest and my noise snaps Ben from his slumber.

"Jane, of thank God you're awake," he says rushing to my side.

"Hi," is all I can get out.

"How are you feeling," he asks with concern.

"Really…sore," I answer. "So…you look awful," I say trying to lighten the mood.

A slight smile touches his lips as he replies, "Hey ease up it's been a long few days."

"Few days," I exclaim. "How long have I been out," I ask worried.

"I think we should page the doctor she'll be able to good over everything with you. Plus I told her I would as soon as you woke up," he answers as he pushes the call button.

Within less than five minutes two nurses and my doctor come walking in. The nurses begin tending to my monitors and everything else that's attached to me as my doctor stands at the end of my bed. She looks up from her papers and smiles warmly at me. "It's nice to finally meet you Jane. So tell me how are you feeling," she asks me.

"Really sore and a little freaked out," I answer honestly.

She nods and replies, "Well that's to be expected after what you've been through. We will get you someone to talk to about the emotional aspect and help you cope. The soreness will fade with time, but for now we'll administer some pain medication. Let me tell you one thing, you are an extremely lucky girl. By some miracle the bullet missed all your vital organs and the shot went clean through. We patched you up and we should be able to get you home within the next couple of days. So do you have any questions for me?"

"Um…just one, why was I asleep for you long," I ask.

"Well, sometimes its how that brain deal with physical trauma like this, but rest assures you will make a full recovery. If you need anything just press the call button, okay? I'll stop by again soon to check on you," she tells me as her and the nurses exit my room.

"Thank you," I say feeling exhausted.

"You should get some rest," I hear Ben suggest.

"Aww…Ben I just woke up," I make a feeble argument as my eyes slide shut.

As I sleep I dream of my own funeral. All of my loved ones and friends have shown up. I watch from the back as everyone pays their last respects to me. Billy walks up and practically throws himself in my casket as he wails, "You can't leave me Janie… I can't do this without you!" Ben and two other people grab him and escort him out whispering soothing words to calm him. The crowd slowly dissipates until there are only two people left. I can't make out who they are so I follow them as they make their way to my coffin. When I reach them I realize that it's Jeremy and India. They are both smiling down at my lifeless body and India says, "See Jeremy I told you our plan would work. Now she'll never bother us again."

"Well thank goodness for that," Jeremy replies as he takes her in his arms and kisses her passionately.

I practically jump out of my hospital bed with shock. I hear Ben's groggy voice coming from beside me, "Jane, what is it are you alright. Are you in pain, because I can page the nurse?" He reaches for the call button, but I grab his hand before he pushes it.

"No I'm not in that much pain I was just having a horrible dream," I answer.

"Oh…well do you want to talk about it," he asks with worry on his face.

"No it's fine, but can you tell me what happened to India," I ask him nervously.

I see anger and anxiety spread across his face as he answers, "Other than a few of her fingerprints the police weren't able to find any trace of her, but they're still looking for her. They're telling me that it's like she vanished into thin air, but they refuse to give up."

As he explained this to me I start to become extremely uneasy. "What about Jeremy, where is he," I ask with a sick feeling rising in my stomach.

Ben clears his throat uncomfortably and answers, "He's the one that found you and brought you to the hospital. After he called me and told me what happened, nobody can seem to reach him and he hasn't been into work either."

As Ben's words sink in I think to myself. _Could he really have planned this whole thing with India? If he did why would he tell me that he was falling for me? If that is the case shouldn't he be here with me? What if India did something to him? Oh God I hope he's alright. _"Ben where's my cell phone," I ask in a panic.

"Its right here," he answers quizzically as he hands me my phone.

I frantically dial Jeremy's number it rings a few time and then goes to voice mail. I decide to send him a text as well.

**To Jeremy:**

**Hey it's Jane, are you okay?**

After a few minutes I realize that he's not going to reply so I hand my phone back to Ben defeated and worn out. I close my eyes and drift off to sleep and this time I dream of Billy.

I wake up the next morning to the sound of my doctor's voice, "Jane, it's time to wake up. It's time for your therapy session." Ben helps me out of bed and into a wheelchair as the doctor moves my IV bag to a portable rack. "Mr. Quimby I'll take her from here. Why don't you pop out and grab you two some breakfast? Her session should only last for about an hour," she says as she steps behind me taking my brother's place.

He opens his mouth to protest, but closes it when I shake my head and say, "Go on I'll be fine." With that the doctor wheels me out of the room. We take the elevator down to the second floor and come to a stop outside a door with the name Dr. Nutter on it. _What are the odds of that?_ I think to myself with a smile as I imagine Billy dressed in a white lab coat. My doctor knocks on the door and I hear a man's voice reply, "Come in."

We enter into a well light office with books lining every wall. The man stands and greets me like we're old friends, "Jane, welcome I'm Doctor Nutter. I'll be your therapist while you are here."

I smile and nod at him as my doctor says, "I'll be back to get you in an hour." She turns and leaves the room closing the door behind her.

"So Jane…tell me…how are you feeling today," he asks with a smile as he takes a seat.

"Well honestly I'm still shook up about all of this. I've been having nightmares about India sometimes," I answer.

"That's perfectly normal. You said you only have these dreams sometimes…what else do you dream about," he inquires.

I feel my face heat up as I blush crimson and answer, "Mostly I dream about my best friend Billy."

"I see…it says here in your file that you are dating this Jeremy fellow, correct," he says looking down at my file.

"Yes it is," I answer sourly.

"Is he ever in you dreams," he asks looking back up at me.

"Actually yes, I had a nightmare about him and India last night," I reply.

"Why don't you tell me about it," he says.

I start by telling how we all know each other. Then I continue on about everything that happened in my dream. When I finish he says, "So subconsciously you think that Jeremy had something to do with this, why is that?"

"I really don't know what to think. All I do know is that he's not here, no one can find him or India and he won't answer my calls or my texts," I answer getting frustrated about the situation.

"I understand… did you ever consider that maybe finding you the way he did was too much for him to handle," he asks.

With his words I get angrier and reply, "It shouldn't matter…if he cares about me like he says he does then he should be here. Just like Billy should, but he isn't either." Tears start to roll down my face as the realization that Billy's not here hits me and the fact that I don't really care that Jeremy isn't.

Doctor Nutter clears his throat bringing me back to the present. "It sounds to me that your best friend is a big part of you. Maybe you should call him that might put you at ease a little" he suggests. With that there is a knock on his door. "Come in…well, it looks like our time is up for today. I've scheduled you another session for tomorrow. I'll see you then, okay," he says bidding me farewell.

As my doctor takes me back to my room I think about Billy and how much I need to talk to him. The walk back seemed to take twice as long as I itch to get to my phone. We finally arrive and the first words out of my mouth are, "Where is my phone?"

Ben looks at me with confusion and hands me my phone as he asks, "Who are you calling?"

"I need to talk to Billy," I reply as I hastily open my phone.

Before I have a chance to dial his number Ben snatches my phone away. "That's not a good idea right now," he says to my anxiously.

"What the hell, Ben? Why not," I ask getting irritated.

He sighs and looks down as he answers, "Look Jane there's something I need to tell you. I didn't want to bring this up after all you've been through, but you're giving me no other option."

Panic rises in my heart and I ask, "What is it Ben…you know why he isn't here. What have you been keeping from me?"

"Well…he was on his way to meet me at the airport. It was raining and I'm sure he was flying on his motorcycle to get there. Apparently a Jeep lost control and hit him head on. Jane, Billy's in a coma and they don't know if he'll ever wake up," he tells me with tears forming in his eyes.

With his words it feels like the world is crumbling around me. I start to struggle for breath as the images of Billy's broken body flash through my mind. _No! Not like this, I can't lose him now. I have to tell him how I fell. He has to know how much I love him. I can't believe Ben kept this from me. I can't believe he would betray me like this knowing I'm in love with him. _A million thought are running through my mind and something in me snaps. For the next few days I don't say a word to anyone. All my thoughts are on Billy and my need to be there with him. Not even Doctor Nutter can manage a peep out of me.

While laying in my hospital bed I over hear Doctor Nutter and my brother. "I just don't understand, the first time I talked to her she seemed like an easy case. Now she won't talk at all. Did something happen after our first session," he asks Ben.

"Well I did tell her about Billy's accident. Come to think of it that's when she stopped talking. Do you think that's what did it," Ben questions.

"I've seen this before, after everything that has happened to you sister I believe the unfortunate news has pushed her over the edge making her retreat into herself," he answers.

"Will she get better," Ben asks desperately.

Doctor Nutter clears his throat and replies, "Really it's hard to say, but I think the best medicine for her now is to get her back home and let her be with her friend."

A few days later my doctor tells us that it's okay for me to leave. Ben and I catch a taxi to my apartment. When we reach my floor Ben opens my apartment door as I lag behind glancing at Jeremy's door. I decide to knock and see if he's home. Without any luck I return to my apartment where Ben is packing all my things. After a few hours we are finished. We take everything that can't be taken on the plane to the post office and ship it back home. We arrive at the airport and board our flight all the while I still can't find my voice.

Our pilot comes over the intercom and announces that we will be landing in ten minutes. Ben sighs with relief and says, "Man it's going to be nice to get you home and get some rest."

I look at him sternly and shake my head no letting him know that I am not going home.

"Come on Jane you can't go see Billy now, you need to get some rest," he tries to argue.

I cross my arms over my chest and shake my head vigorously. As we land Ben lets out a grunt of defeat and says, "Fine I'll drop you off at the hospital, but I need to go home and get some sleep."

When we pull up to the hospital I practically leap out of the car and race up to Billy's room. I barge in ignoring the nurse's protest. I stop dead in my tracks as I see Billy lying in the bed with all kinds of tubes and wires running from him to machines. His handsome face is unrecognizable with all the bruises and cuts. The sight is too much for me to handle and I collapse to the floor. I feel hands helping me to my feet and escorting me to a chair at Billy's side.

Eventually I become aware of my surroundings when I hear a nurse say, "Miss visiting hours are over for today. So if you're not immediate family you'll have to come back tomorrow."

I look up at her from my chair and with a cracky voice I tell her, "I hate to break this to you sweetie, but the only way you're going to get me to leave is if you call security and have them drag me out. This is my best friend and I'm the closest thing he's got to family." I look down at him and take his limp warm hand in mine ignoring the nurse as she leave in a huff.

When I'm sure the nurse is gone I let out a sigh and say, "Hi Billy it's me, Jane. I don't know if you can hear me, but if you can I need you to know that I can't lose you. I can't imagine my life without you in it. You're my best friend and…and I need you to wake up so I can tell you how in love with you I am. So I need you to fight and come back to me." Of course there's no response from him so I decide to curl up in the chair next to him and get some sleep.

Over the next five months I stay by his side, only leaving to take a shower. I spend those days talking to him about everything and reading to him. Everything that happened to me in London has been pushed out of my mind as I take care of Billy. I've been at the hospital for so long the nurses were nice enough to bring in a second bed for me to sleep in.

One night while I'm laying down trying to get some sleep my text alert goes off. I open my phone shocked to see a message from Jeremy.

**To: Jane**

**Hello Jane, how are you?**

**To Jeremy:**

**Really? **

**After all this time you decide to contact me now and that's all you have to say to me?**

**To Jane:**

**Look I'm sorry about leaving you like I did, but after finding you like that…all bloody and pale…I just had to get away**

**The thought of loosing you was too much for me to handle.**

**To Jeremy:**

**That's the worst explanation ever.**

**If you really cared about me like you said you did you would never have left me there like that?**

**What's worse is that nobody could get in touch with you…which made me worry that India did something to you.**

**That was extremely inconsiderate of you to put everyone through that.**

**To: Jane**

**I know and I'm sorry love.**

**I just hope we will be able to work things out between us.**

**To: Jeremy**

**You must be joking!?**

**I mean one day I might be able to forgive you and be your friend, but all romantic feelings for you are gone.**

**They've been replaced with feelings of betrayal.**

**Besides I'm in love with someone else and he needs me.**

**So I think we're done, I'll let you know if I ever forgive you.**

**Goodbye Jeremy.**

Without even caring about his response I shut my phone. I look over at Billy who is lying in the bed next to me. I sadly think to myself with tears forming in my eyes. _Come on Billy I need you to get better for me, please._ With that I close my eyes and fall asleep.

**Authors Note: Sorry it took so long to post this chapter I had a slight writers block problem, but your reviews pushed me on so THANK YOU!**


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